Can't take much more!!

I literally am at the end of my patience! I can't cope with the endless waiting, alongside the lack of help for my ON as well as this new pain around my battery site. 

This new pain has been much worse the last 3 days, and randomly causes sharp, stabbing pain lower down in my abdomen and sometimes is tender to touch. If clothes brush over this area it feels 'odd'. I can't explain the feeling properly but it just feels different, more sensitive I guess.

I don't know how to manage all this!!

I have also developed a hacking cough and this is causing my stomach muscles to work a lot and much more often than usual, this definitely causes some of the battery site pain, as I can feel it when I've been coughing. 

This, again, doesn't help.

I feel lost. Like it's all hopeless. I'm waiting patiently but it's going on too long. Even when I finally get to see my consultant next week, I undoubtably will have another wait, for who knows how long! I am going to have to be truly honest about what I feel and what I need. 

An answer would I be a start. And a date of when things can be done!

Here's a photo update of my incision sites and tender battery and wire area.

The wire can clearly be seen as a loop at the base of my ribs. This protrudes more if I twist the top half of my body to the right, whilst the bottom leans left.

This photo clearly shows my abdominal muscles are alongside the battery area, as the battery area is very flat and the rounded dip is the muscle that pushes on it. I am also sure that when I sit down the battery is pushed over my hip bone and the sticks out. I can feel lumpy tissue thy has grown into the battery at this point and it is uncomfortable. 

Here is the awful and still tender scar on my chest. It is very red and lumpy and itches and often has a 'spiky' tingly feeling if something brushes on it.

Here you can see the looped extra wire in my neck. This also itches still and is very annoying and in the way. It's very difficult to scratch because of the amount it sticks out.

Here's another view. You can see the very neat scar here but the loop of wire is still clearly visible.

Scar update

Thought it was about time to share how my scars are! 

Overall they are really good!

My stomach one is the best. 

You can barely see it now! Only problem is, I am almost certain I am going to end up with a new incision there, to sort out the battery movement issues. Shame really!!

My chest one is still irritating. It's looking slightly better but still very obvious compared to the rest, and the other half of it. 

It is still really itchy and sensitive when clothes or hair touch it. I am constantly itching it but it hurts to itch on it, so I am always trying to scratch around it. I am sti using rose hip oil on it, but really it just soothes it temporarily as I don't think it is making it look any better anymore.

My head scar is very fine and barely seen but it's the excess wire loop that is noticeable.

I do wear my hair up for the gym and that is manageable but I have worn my hair up for work a couple of times and by the end of the working day my head is tight and achy, so I can't keep it up any longer.

Scars and wires

Thought I'd update on how my scars are doing, as feel like I haven't for a while!

I have been on holiday recently and wasn't bothered by my stomach scar at all! In fact you can barely see it now I'm tanned!! Am pleased with it, especially considering how upset I was with it initially.

It will be ultra annoying if I do need another operation to anchor or move the battery, as I'll be back to square one. But presumably my stomach seems to heal well! 

My head scar isn't bad, as I've said all along, it's just the loop of wires that bugs me and is far more obvious than the scar itself.

You see the round circle of excess wore and its this area that protrudes and therefore itches and annoys me, as I feel it when I put my hair up etc.

My chest scar is still just as bad, in my opinion. The flat half is barely noticeable but the raised half is pink and taught, meaning it itches, is sensitive to clothes touching it and is obvious even through clothes with mesh or lace at the top. I really want something to be done about this scar. 

Forget the ugliness, it's more abut the over sensitivity that I am annoyed by more. This is constant and isn't getting any easier!!

As I have mentioned before, I have had an issue with the battery and wires moving since February. The wires are still noticeably lose and the excess loop can still be seen. I am sure it has moved slightly to move over my ribs than the space underneath. 

This proves to me that the battery has moved upwards.

Consultant gives me a call

As I did have my consultant's secretary's number, I did leave a message yesterday and this morning I got a phone call from my consultant himself! 

I explained what had happened abd said that the battery area was tender yet the implant all still works properly, and he said he wasn't too worried about it and that it would be fine for him to check things over on our follow up appointment on 4th March. I asked if I shouldn't have been stretching at the gym, and he said I should be able to do that and not to worry about doing those things in the future. 

He asked how the implant was working and I said that for everyday it works really well and that I don't feel the pain but when it is really bad pain I haven't found a program to help as this doesn't happen often enough to try lots of programs. 

He suggested that he will contact the rep to reprogram on the date I have the follow up appointment. 

So overall, my worries are relieved and again he is very easy going about what I can do, which is perhaps why I didn't really get any advise at the hospital.